Appreciating the moment .

I have my exam tomorrow so for today I'll be stay at home for the entire day .. 
to study. And once in a while go on instagram. Or maybe every 10 minutes. 
And I don't have work today as well, to prepare all my answers and plaster them
in my brain.

And I've been thinking. Sometimes as human beings we don't appreciate the moment.
You know what I mean?

When you're out on Christmas day with your family or friends or any loved ones,
You sometimes tend to not appreciate the moment that you have with them and just
take them for granted.

Well, if you're not like that, Good job! 

But unfortunately, I'm like that.

Whenever I'm with my loved ones outside or just staying at home together,
I totally do not appreciate and cherish the moment I have with them.

An example is when I'm with my boyfriend. When I'm with him, I'll go mad at
every small little thing and make a big fuss out of everything and in the end,
our mood is spoilt. Because of me. 
And when he is not with me, I compliant that I miss him, I want him beside me now,
where is he, I feel so lonely without him, I feel so empty without him by my side etc etc

I feel so stupid to be like this. Why am I like this?
Was I born with this personality characteristic that I will never appreciate the moments
I have with the ones I love? 

And before I had a job, I always complained that I had no money, I want to work, I want to earn money, I feel so bored at home and I want to get a job to pass time etc etc
And now when I have a job, I always don't want to go to work and compliant that I'm so lazy, blah blah blah

When I'm at work, I want to go home. When I don't have work, I want to go work. 

What is this shit man seriously ?!

I don't know if it's just me, or many others are also like that.

But one thing I know for sure, is that I want to change, to change that I will
appreciate and cherish and remember the good memories in that moment. 

Because once the moment is gone, it is gone for good. 


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